I lost it!

My mucus plus!!
hehe!
Anything gets me excited now a days! ;-)

PS: yesterday's full moon didn't work for us (silly myths! blah!) and unless I have her in 9 hrs, everyone's predictions were wrong! :-P

Getting a "little" desperate...

BLAH!


I can't even tell you how anxious I am.
I know it is exciting to not know what is going to happen and when Julianna will be ready to come into this world, but the suspense is killing me!
Lots of people have been telling me (and some of these guesses are from a while ago) that she is going to be born on Thursday - which is TOMORROW!
Tonight there is a full moon.
Could they be right?
Hmmm.... I don't know, but it feels like she is going to stay put for at least another week.


I am totally obsessed with having a VBAC right now.  The more I read about it, the more I want it.  The only problem is, I haven't been really dealing with the most supportive Dr in the world - and to my understanding, that makes ALL the difference!


Last Monday (2 days ago), I went to my 38 week appointment.  I was thrilled to hear that my body is still progressing little by little.  I went from 2 cm dilated to 3! YEY! and also from 50% effaced to 70%.  Not sure what the station of the baby is, but she said she is still pretty high.
Anyways, as I was getting checked, I noticed my Dr was doing something in there that did NOT feel normal.  Of course, the chicken that I am, I didn't say anything.
It actually HURT.
After I got dressed, I went to her office to have a little chat with her about, well, u know, my VBAC, and how I still want to continue waiting until I pass my 40 weeks.
She wasn't excited.  I even asked her if she felt ok, bc she was just so cold and distant.
She proceeded to tell me that today she stripped my membranes, so things should get moving faster!
Wait! WHAT? You did what?
I was in shock!  I couldn't believe she would do such thing without even asking me or letting me know what she was doing!
Again, I didn't say a word! ugh!  But Hello! That is HUGE!
Oh - you may not know what stripping membranes is. 
Here:  "Stripping the membranes is when a midwife, doctor or even the pregnant women inserts two fingers into the vagina and makes a sweeping motion inside the cervix to loosen not only the mucus plug but the bag of water from the uterus"  OH, and this is done to promote LABOR - which  I guess, sometimes works and sometimes it doesn't.


Anyways, she basically tried to induce me and I was NOT fine with that!
I stood there like a lost puppy and continued my conversation as to how long she was going to let me go without going in to get "literally induced" (u know, breaking my water, pitocin...)
***  I DO NOT WANT TO GET INDUCED *** But I guess, if I pass a certain point without going into spontaneous labor, I have to.
She started looking at her calendar and told me, May 10th!
What?
That's like only 1 day after my due date!
When I say I want to go past my due date, it means about a week or a week and a half past that day!  Not just a day!
Anyways, we ended our conversation with the usual "we will see what happens at the next appointment:".
And to be honest with you, I just don't feel like arguing with her or being too assertive.
I don't want her to think I am being disrespectful or too bitchy, when she is my Dr.  PLUS she is the one responsible for my baby's life (and mine too, for that matter).
I like her, I think she is super nice - but it just doesn't feel like she is going to try to get me to have a successful VBAC.  It doesn't seem like she is passionate about it like I thought she was.  On the contrary, it looks to me that she wants baby out soon, no matter how.  And that makes me sad!


As I left her office, I was feeling down (again).
I guess I just have to continue waiting to see what happens and breathe a lot and hope that things DO work out for me, one way or another.
"Que sea lo que Dios quiera"
(meaning, I leave it in God's hands)
Ultimately, I want to have and hold my HEALTHY baby girl in my arms, no matter how she comes into this world.


Today, I am 38 weeks 4 days.
I feel a bit better than yesterday.  (Forgot to mention, the membrane stripping thing made my body contract a LOT and get horrible menstrual-like cramps).
I am NOT sure if I am letting her do an internal next Monday.  Everyone tells me not to, but I am kind of obsessed with hearing my progress and see if I dilated anymore. So we will see.


I am glad I didn't go into labor right after she did that, because if I had gone into labor and had my baby via C-Section, I would have always believed that would had been the reason and been very upset.


I hope things happen soon! I hope this is the last post I do before going into labor and having my princess.
I mean, it could be, if i don't get in here again.  But if by next Monday nothing happens, chances are, I will blog again.  :-/


Common Baby Julianna! You know you want to meet me and ur daddy and gorgeous little brother! Or maybe not! Maybe she hears all the chaos always and Jojo's tantrums and is deciding to stay in there a bit longer! :-p

A look back...

I kind of wanted to get a little better with my blog.  Especially during these past weeks, when there is so much going on and my life is about to change again!

The thing is, I am just hanging in here.
Waiting patiently anxiously for Julianna to tell me when she is ready!
I know, I know, I am still not on my 40th week.  I kinda should relax until due date and if something happens before, then GREAT!
But I can't!
Maybe because my Dr. keeps trying to scare me and tell me I have a big baby in there and she thinks she may get stuck.
Maybe cause I had Jonathan at 38 weeks (which would be this Saturday for Julianna)
or Maybe because I am JUST READY! My body is ready, my mind is ready....


2 weeks ago I was soooooooooo excited! I was at 2cm and 50% effaced.  Last monday appointment= nothing! :-(
Everything is Status Quo - booo!!!!


So, sorry, I don't have great news to blog about right now.

My days are somewhat boring.  I am just literally waiting, waiting and waiting...

Jojo is AWESOME of course! He is fun and funny (although today he was particularly cranky - and so was I)
Jodi is just working from home
Punky howling at everything
and well, u know..... the usual....



So I figured I would dedicate my newest post to my belly pictures this time around. (some, of course).

Enjoy looking at how my princess grows in there!
And yes, I DO KNOW there is only 1 in there.
 I make big bellies - for those who know me from before! :-P

(this last one was taken w my cell phone while I waited for the belly cast to dry!)

Maybe I will take some more before my little Julianna makes her grand debut!

(depending on the mood, I can't promise anything)

Will be back if anything happens....

(could be back sooner, but I am not sure who would want to read about my achy back & hips, and my contractions, lack of sleep, 5 runs to go pipi in the middle of the night, ohhh, my gorgeous, NEW stretch marks....  I can go on...)

But hey, don't take me wrong!  I STILL EMBRACE and LOVE being pregnant!

I am just a little naggy lately.  And I am allowed! :-P

Ta ta!

Okay, I am ready! I think!!!

I took a long shower today, blow dried my hair nicely, painted my nails with a very pretty pink nail polish...

I feel like I can't do anything more to prepare.  I mean, how do you prepare more when you don't even know what is going to happen? Or when it's going to happen, I should say.

With Jonathan, I had a scheduled C-Section.  It fell on a Friday and we were all completely ready for him to arrive.  Everything was planned, scheduled and things just had to flow the way we wanted them to. And they kinda of did. I mean, surgery was ok, recuperation, not so good.  But that's another story.

Now, I want it all to be different. 
I am on my 37th week and there is nothing I want more than to have this baby choose her birthday and for me to deliver her in the most natural way possible. 
I know I had a C-Section and plenty of you out there think it may be to risky to even try it.  But I have informed myself very well on this topic and if everything goes well, it could happen very easily.
The risks are really not that high and I wont even go into what I think about Doctors and Hospitals regarding this.
So yes, I want to have a VBAC - Vaginal Birth After C-Section.
I am getting a Doula to help me during labor and delivery and I just know, that was probably the best decision I have made in a while.

I am extremly anxious because I feel like she may come anyday now!
My Braxton Hicks get stronger and stronger.  I feel her so low and some of her kicks are very painful.
Her head is down and my body is getting ready! I know it!

BESIDES THE FACT THAT A WEEK AGO, LAST MONDAY, DR. F TOLD ME I WAS 2 CENTIMETERS DILATED AND 50% EFFACED!!!!
THAT IS HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGE FOR ME!  I HAVE REPEATED THIS TO MYSELF SOOOO MANY TIMES! LOL

This past week I have walked a little, I have been drinking Raspberry Leaf Tea, Taking Evening Primrose Oil Pills (and inserting one here and there), bouncing on the Yoga Ball and even a little extra curricular activity w my baby's daddy.  (which I have to say, was very ackward and funny - but hey! whatever helps!)

My next appointment is TOMORROW and I do not think I have been this anxious in a while!
I can't wait till she checks me and tells me what has happened this week!
Could I be more? Has my body progressed? Are we getting closer and closer????
AHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I am going crazy!
I want to know!
But I want to hear good news of course!!!

My mom is packing her bags already and that makes me feel so happy bc I know she is getting ready too!
Jodi's mom and dad close on their new home on Wednesday, and after that, they will be here as soon as we call them (Well, 6 hrs after or so, since they have a long drive).
Christian and Lisa are ready for our phone call so they can help with Jojo, if we have to head to the hospital and no one has arrived yet...
My bags are packed.
Her little area in my closet and next to my side of the bed is ready - pack and play, changing station (which is a dresser with the changing pad on top, since we don't have much room for the real changing table in our room), my glider, her swing, diaper genie, etc etc....
Oh Gosh! This anticipation is driving me crazy now!
The thing is, I still have 20 days until my official due date!!!
20 days!!!!!!!!!!!!
It's so close but so far!!!!

I feel SO PREGNANT! and I look SO PREGNANT!
I feel pretty sometimes though, which is great! Because I am very very big right now and can hardly walk around.

I am soooo desperate to meet Julianna!
I guess I will try to update tomorrow after my Dr's Appt!

I know I have been neglecting this blog! I will try to get on here a little more often, even if it's just a small entry!

I feel like I am rambing and just going all over the place with this one, so I will finish it now! lol

Wish me luck tomorrow! ahhh!!!!!!!!!!!!