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October 18, 2010

Never felt more like a mommy...

... like I did this past weekend.

Don't take me wrong. 
Ever since I got that first positive pregnancy test, I already started getting that mommy feeling I was always dreaming of.
*  Well, not always.  Maybe back in the day, when I was single and having a bit of fun, I wasn't dreaming about it that much *
But yes, once I found out I was baking my own little baby, it all started.
It's insane how much we already love a child we have not even met.
I remember even wanting to celebrate mother's day with a big ol belly :-)
I felt like a mommy since day 1.  Me and my Jojo had a special bond.
Every hiccup, every kick and every little movement, was a reminder of that.

After 28 months of being Jonathan's mommy and 5 months of being Julianna's, I thought I knew what being a mommy really felt like. 
U know, the usual mommy duties.  Changing diapers, cleaning after them, feeding, playing, teaching, putting on time out, answering to "momma" twelve thousand times a day, cleaning spit up, doing laundry, bathing, hugging, kissing, laughing with them..etc etc...
But one weekend, with two sick, VERY sick kids, changed it all.
And I have to add, Daddy was out of town.  So that made it even more intense.

So there I was, running from room to room in the middle of the night, trying to take care of both of my darling babies at the same time.
Jonathan would wake up crying and calling for me everytime he coughed.
And Julianna wanted to nurse all night.
Both temperatures kept going up.  I was scared.
What if they get so bad I have to take them to the hospital?
How in the world am I going to manage that all by myself?

It didn't get that bad, thank God.  I think the highest was 103.6.  Which was pretty scary for me. 

It was a long night.  Sometimes I slept in the guest bed with Jojo, then I would go to my bed to lay with Julianna and nurse her.  Then back to Jojo's.
I couldn't get them in the same room, because if Julianna went down, Jojo would cough and wake her up. 
And vice versa. 
The hardest thing was NOT that I was exhausted  beyond belief.  It was looking at them looking at me with their sad, tired loopy eyes and not being able to do anything!




It killed me.  It tore my heart into one trillion pieces.
I wanted to cry, but I think I was too tired to.
I just wanted them to go to sleep and feel better.
My poor babies! I have never seen such pitiful faces.
I hated every second of that night with a passion.
I couldn't sleep.  They couldn't sleep.
They would cry and I would just hold them tight, trying to comfort them as much as I could.

At 5 in the morning, I was laying in bed with Julianna.  We were both "asleep".  I think we had been sleeping for about 10 minutes until I heard a big "Bump".  I knew Jojo was up.  I jumped up extremely fast to run to his room before he could get to me and Julianna.  Too late.  We met in the middle, the Den.  I knew there was no way I could get him to lay down in his room, so I brought him into the big bed trying to keep him quiet.  Of course, that was impossible. Little sister woke up.
5:15.  Were were all sitting there watching Umizoomi. 
Great.
At this point I didn't care if I didn't get any sleep.  I didn't care I felt miserable, I just didn't want them to.

I wasn't sure how I was going to function during the day.  But most importantly, take care of them.
Interestingly enough, I had energy.
Also, my father and Carmen came over in the afternoon and brought some much needed supplies.


I had nothing for sick kids, besides the infant tylenol.
No Klennexes, No vaporizer, no benadryl...  I did have Vicks though and thermomethers! hehe!!

They brought lunch and spent a few hours here. Both babies napped.


I was happy about that.

At night, my friend Jamie came over to help as well.

She watched them while I showered.  Thank Lord I was able to.  I needed it.

After their baths, I was putting some alcoholado (bay rum) all over Jojo's legs, feet and chest.  (Not sure, but I think that is totally a puertorican thing) and it hit me!
I couldn't feel more proud of myself that day.  I dont know why, it's weird to explain. 
Maybe cause it brought back memories of when I was a kid and my mom would take care of me. 
Now I was doing the same with my own babies.
I felt like a MOMMY.  BIG TIME.
I felt like I was the most important person in the whole universe.  Their universe at least.  And they are the only ones that matter anyways.
I felt like my job was more important than president Obama's.
Who cares about the rest of the world right now?  My world are my babies and as long as they are taken care of, anything else doesn't matter as much.

I lathered both of their feet with Vicks, put their pj's on and turned my new vaporizer on.

I was almost done with the day and I did it! I survived! And with NO SLEEP! :-)

Jamie left. 
Jojo was watching cartoons (you guessed it right, Omizoomi again! obsessed little child!)  in bed and fell asleep pretty fast.
Julianna nursed for about an hour before I transfered her to her swing.
And that was it!

My babies were alseep. Thank you Lord!
Their fevers were contained. 
And I was able to go downstairs and have dinner.  Granted it was like 10pm, but I felt GREAT.

My little ones were on the road to recovery and I helped them!
Well, the medicines had a little to do with it.  But I was there for them 1001%. 
And will ALWAYS BE.

Even though Julianna didn't sleep much and Jojo was up a few times, the night was much much better than the one before.

Today, a day after, they are a little better.
They don't seem to be hurting as much.  And I even have had some smiles.
Poor Jojo's nose is like a little faucet.  His cough is BAD and he doesn't like to blow on the tissue, so that's a struggle.  But he is being his bratty self, and I love it.
Julianna is doing great.  Very little fever and a bit more clingy, if that is even possible.

We are waiting for Dad now.  He should be here in the next 2 hours.
And he needs to hurry.
Because I have a feeling he will too be acting as a nurse soon.
For me.
I am getting sick too.
Oh well, such is life.
Maybe I should call my own mommy to take care of ME! hehe!
Wait! She is far.  Boo!
I guess husband will do.  (even though we all know how men are as nurses...)



oh, ps! this is what alcoholado looks like, if u were curious!